Taking out the trash

Recently, I saw a thought-provoking Facebook post shared by a friend:

When you throw the trash out, do you go outside later and check how it’s doing? No?
So stop talking to your ex.

Of course, for this to be true, the caveat is that there are no kids from that relationship.  But haven’t we all seen this behavior when a relationship ends poorly?  I knew a guy who struggled like that.  He was on-again-off-again with a girl and even when his friends were telling him to stay away, he’d reply telling us, “I know, but I can’t help but go back.”

In his mind, he was stuck.  He had hitched his wagon to this girl and was going to go wherever she would lead him – no matter how much pain, fighting, grief, and stress would come.  He may not have used this exact wording, but he really was enslaved to her.  He had done it to himself, and he saw no way out.

There is a proverb that goes along perfectly with his situation:

Proverbs 26:11
As a dog returns to its vomit,
so also a fool repeats his foolishness

It’s easy to identify this cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior in others.  When you see them go back – yet again – it just boggles the mind.  As soon as a dog throws up, it immediately starts to lick up the vomit.  Similarly, without even thinking about it, a fool jumps right back into his foolishness.  And when that fool is your friend or a family member…you can feel pretty helpless.

If you are fortunate enough to have a good romantic relationship, it can be easy to get a little snooty about those who struggle in this manner.  But the truth is, Christians struggle with this same behavior…not always in an amorous sense, but the same self-destructive-enslaved behavior is often closer than we care to admit.  Ever “slip back into an old habit”?  Ever have a tough day and seek comfort in an old vice?  Ever get caught off-guard or become so embarrassed that you flame-spray whomever bumped you?  Ever get mad enough to threaten violence?

Paul addressed this struggle when he wrote to the believers in Rome.  Although he wrote to a group of people who were already saved and part of the local house churches, Paul took them through the entire scope of a believer’s experience: The failings of humanity (Romans 1:18-3:20), how one becomes right with God (Romans 3:21-5:11), and how to live the victorious Christian life (Romans 5:12-8:39).

It’s in the third section that Paul discusses how we can deal with the conflict inside us – between our new nature and our old nature, the Spirit of God in us vs. our physical fleshly bodies.  The first part to defeating the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior involves our mindset:

Romans 6:6-11
For we know that our old self was crucified with Him so that the body ruled by sin might be rendered powerless so that we may no longer be enslaved to sin, since a person who has died is freed from sin.  Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with Him, because we know that Christ, having been raised from the dead, will not die again.  Death no longer rules over Him.

For the death He died, He died to sin once for all time; but the life He lives, He lives to God.  So, you too consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.

When we believe in Jesus for eternal life, we are identified with Jesus and declared righteous before God.  As a result, Jesus is now our example.  Since we are identified with the once for all time death He died, Paul tells us to shift our thinking about our cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior.  He says to consider yourselves dead to sin.  Those old feelings, thoughts, habits, and vices have all been taken out with the trash.  Don’t go back out and check on them.  Instead consider yourselves…alive to God in Christ Jesus.

But practically speaking, our minds aren’t the only battle ground for this struggle.  Sometimes, we still want to be the way we were before.  It felt good (in the moment) and our body craves going back.  That’s why the second part to defeating the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior involves how we use our physical body:

Romans 6:12-13
Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, so that you obey its desires.  And do not offer any parts of it to sin as weapons for unrighteousness.  But as those who are alive from the dead, offer yourselves to God, and all the parts of yourselves to God as weapons for righteousness.

Once we see ourselves clearly, it’s time to flip the script on how we use our bodies.  I don’t think Paul is being metaphorical here with this “body talk”.  Wherever you struggle, make that a point of emphasis to good things instead:

Has your tongue been used for gossip?  Now purposely be encouraging.
Have your hands been violent?  Find ways to help others. 
Were you sexually promiscuous?  Offer your body only to your spouse. 
Have your feet taken you to places that make you stumble?  Go to places that build you up.

Changing your mindset is not easy.  Physically doing these things is not easy, either.  It takes practice and sacrifice.  However, these changes do not go unnoticed by God.  Later on, Paul adds this:

Romans 12:1-2
Therefore, brothers and sisters, in view of the mercies of God, I urge you to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God; this is your true worship.  Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

Renewing our minds and offering our bodies for good is pleasing to God.  And don’t miss what God gives in return – the ability to recognize the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

The good news is you don’t have to live trapped inside the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior.  Jesus is our example for the way out.

Keep Pressing,
Ken