Face paint and finding the good

I find it so easy to find something to be upset about.  Especially by the end of each day, when the hard stuff is still heavy in my mind.  It would be easy to blame my sour attitude on the constant barrage of negativity coming from our politicians, or social media, or the 24-hour bad-news cycle.  While yesterday it could have been the advertisements that made me feel like I don’t provide well enough for my family, today’s irritation could have easily come from a coworker, and tomorrow’s could be another driver on my way to the grocery store.

Getting upset is easy.  Thinking about why I get upset is hard, for two reasons…first, because I have to be honest with myself, and second (because of the first) I usually realize that whatever it is that made me upset was often just a small part of my day.  Let me give you an example:

Many of you know that my wife runs her own business.  She’s a ridiculously talented face painter, and you’ll find her at festivals, fairs, and birthday parties.  She handles most events on her own, but for the occasional large festival, I will work as her line manager.  My job is to engage the customers, help them choose a design, handle the money, and make sure the line moves in an orderly fashion.  All my work is to make sure my wife can focus on being the artist and not worry about anything other than creating fun and delight for both kids and adults.

As you can imagine, we meet a wide-variety of people during these events.  Some are more friendly than others.  Some are so excited they can hardly contain themselves.  Some are just hot and tired.  Some parents are more excited about having their child painted than their child is about getting painted.  There’s always some parent who doesn’t like the prices and wants to “negotiate”.  All different backgrounds, races, economic status…so you never know how an interaction is going to go. 

Most interactions are positive.  Kids love getting their face painted and parents feed off of the kids’ excitement.  When I was helping my wife a couple weekends ago, we had a great time, a steady line, and many happy customers.  However, at the end of the event, two interactions continued to spin in my mind.  The first was a dad who wanted to negotiate on a take home item that we sell, but when I wouldn’t lower the price to the level he wanted, he resorted to insults and left.  The second person came up after we had closed down.  When I informed him that we had finished for the night…he left in a huff, griping that all he was trying to do was read one of our menu boards. 

I stewed over these two guys for quite a while, even into the next day.  Their selfish attitudes really bothered me, since they acted as if we were trying to take advantage of them.  The longer I churned over their lousy behavior, the more my attitude darkened and my thoughts were of nothing else.  I did nothing wrong, but was insulted.  I was certain that they would complain about their interaction with us.  I became more and more irritated thinking about how their grousing to others would look bad on my wife’s business.

And then, I remembered…that we had served over 150 people at that festival.  Everyone but those two were ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED with how their session turned out.  We even had a little girl who loved her art so much that she brought her dad back to get painted and then later still, she brought her friend to get painted, too.  We had others stop back by just to say “hi” and show us how well the paint was lasting on such a hot day.  We had a quartet of elderly ladies each get a glitter tattoo – they were an absolute hoot to interact with!  To top it all off, the fair was also her most successful event in terms of gross profits. 

When I realized how wrong it was that I was focusing entirely on those two bad interactions, this verse immediately came to mind:

Philippians 4:8
Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable – if there is any moral excellence and if there is anything praiseworthy – dwell on these things.

The Apostle Paul wanted the believers in Philippi to be careful with what their thoughts were dwelling on.  The truth is…whatever we spend time thinking about will inevitably grow in our life.  If I continued to stew over the behavior of these two dads, then I would have allowed those irritations and frustrations to grow into something much more unhealthy – likely something that would impact those around me (but not the guys who aggravated me). 

When I stepped back and focused on all the good things that came from our efforts, the irritation quickly evaporated.  It was a good event.  There were many lovely and praiseworthy moments.  I’ll choose to dwell on those instead.

Keep Pressing,
Ken